7 Tips for Networking at a Virtual Conference

 

A picture of my at-home workstation during
a virtual conference in a pandemic.

Virtual conferences have been a standard part of organizational life during the COVID-19 pandemic. Accessibility for folks who can't travel was such a positive outcome for advocacy groups that I predict we’ll see them continue to offer virtual components to conferences even when we can gather again. So many new activists were able to participate! On the other hand, it’s been difficult to recreate networking opportunities through our computer screens.

My first virtual conference felt rather unsatisfying. Sure, I learned new information by watching speakers, but I longed for the relationship-building part of an in-person conference. I didn’t feel like I met many new people and resolved to do better with each successive conference.

Since then, I’ve learned a few ways to make the most of networking during a virtual conference. Every conference is different depending on which platforms they choose and how they choose to use them. But they usually contain some common features - like zoom meetups, pre-conference chat discussions, and Q&A opportunities - that can raise your visibility and help you get to know people. 

RESULTS uses the Whova platform to host the conference event, info,
and community discussions. This is a screen capture of the agenda window.

My main piece of advice is: get in there and participate! But how? Here are my seven tips for making the most of a virtual conference:

1. Be Positive

Humans gravitate to people who are positive and encouraging. I believe this is especially true in when virtually interacting with a group of strangers. You might possess a razor-sharp, wry wit in face-to-face encounters yet that never seems to come through well in typed comments. I’ve seen things go awry when someone takes it upon themselves to criticize someone else’s answer to a getting-to-know-you ice breaker question. I mean…what the heck? If their preference isn’t racist or hurtful, don’t “yuck their yum” (as the head of my kids’ school would say).

I have another reason for staying positive...my kids attend RESULTS conferences with me online. As a mom, I wouldn't want to write anything out on those apps that I'd be embarrassed for my kids to read! So, assume the best intentions of people, lay off the all-caps key, and remember that it’s even easier to walk away from an irritating situation on a computer than it is in real life.

2. Ask Insightful Questions

A picture of me raising my hand.

I’ve been in conferences where participants were shy to ask the first question. It made for many awkward pauses in Q&A sections. Now, I try to come up with at least one question before the session even starts. A thoughtful question can help get the ball rolling (great for everyone) and make a good impression on others (great for your networking).

To inspire ideas for questions, read session descriptions beforehand and maybe even google the speakers. Keep your question concise and on topic. Pay attention during the session to make sure you won’t ask about something that was already covered. Most of the time, virtual conferences just have folks write questions in a chat box, but if you get to turn your microphone or camera, be sure to say your name and your city before your question.

3. Be Helpful

A friendly, helpful attitude is a way to attract positive attention from attendees and organizers alike. For instance, I attended a writing conference where everyone first joined a main room while all session content was in several breakout rooms with different names. People could step out and interact in the main room anytime, but there were often clueless participants in there trying to find their way around, too. I was one of the clueless people at first! To help others costs nothing and creates a lot of goodwill.

4. Expand Your Social Media Network

Logos of Facebook, Twitter,
and LinkedIn

We can’t hand anyone a physical business card, but virtual conferences have the advantage of displaying names of participants. Some use large zoom rooms where you can see names underneath pictures. Some conferences use apps that list all the participants with profiles, so you can see if you share similar professional or social interests. Take advantage of the ability to see names by connecting with them on social media platforms like LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram. That way you can continue your conversations well after the conference is over.

5. Stay On Topic

When overzealous participants fill the conference apps with off topic links or comments, it can be super annoying. It can also push relevant posts so far down that others can’t find information they want. If the conference app lets you share articles, make sure you share links to pieces related to the focus of the conference. Some people try to connect with others by sharing different interests, but sharing too many unrelated posts and articles can have the opposite effect by irritating fellow participants.

6. Try Out New Technology

My teens love to tease me about how I don’t like to download new apps to my phone or computer. I’m turning into an old curmudgeonly lady who doesn’t like to learn how to use new-fangled things. But if you don’t commit to learning to use each conference platform to the fullest, you’re excluding yourself from networking opportunities!

CARE held a virtual 75th Anniversary event with that used “proximity voice chat” to create a cocktail party experience. (Anyone who plays Among Us is familiar with that tech) We uploaded pictures of ourselves, so we could move our avatars around the screen. If you moved closer to another group of avatars, you could converse with them. If you moved farther away, you couldn’t hear them anymore, much like an actual party. There was also a screen in the virtual room that had some content playing. I could have just parked myself by the movie screen and simply watched the recorded content since I was clumsy at using the unfamiliar platform. Instead, I made myself use it and connected with old and new friends in a way that was really engaging!

7. Make Space for Others

Yes, networking requires you to be visible and active, but take care not to dominate the conversation. For instance, if you share so many articles and links in the conference app that it pushes other people's suggestions right off of the visible list, you've essentially cut them out of the conversation even if you mean well. (I've made that mistake before) 

You can participate in a way that helps others be comfortable in sharing their thoughts. I believe the best kinds of interactions are ones where you create room for others to shine, too! Pre-conference chats are not quiz shows where you need to be first with the best answer.

By the way, this is especially important advice for white folks. Virtual conferences have not removed the habits of white privilege. I try to promote myself in a way that demonstrates an ability to be kind, humble, and sensitive to others.

What are YOUR tips for networking at virtual conferences?

"How to Respond With Kindness" OR "How Not Be a Jerk Online"

Show of metaphorical cyberspace hands, please...how many of you have seen something you disagreed with on your Twitter or Facebook feeds since Election Day? How many of you have responded on your own feed or commented on someone else's just to have it blow up into a vitriolic back and forth that left you feeling much worse than if you'd never checked your social media at all? I think it's happened to most of us. 

I find myself thinking about some of the rules of thumb I've created for myself in order to be the kind of person I want to be online. I'm sharing them with you, not to be preachy, but to remind myself to stick to my personal guidelines. Facebook comments are rarely a place where thoughtful exchange of ideas can change ideas that are fundamental to personal identities. Yet I hope my suggestions can help others navigate social media in a positive and constructive way.

"I see you, Mommy"

#1 Write as if your kids were reading over your shoulder.
You know the old response to sexual harassers that goes, "What would your mother say if she knew you were saying that?" I think we moms should ask ourselves, "What would your children say if they knew what you wrote?" Set the same good example in your on-line life that you set for them in-person. Besides, I'm not convinced that everything we do online ever goes away. The kids will probably find it eventually. 


#2 Remember there is a real person on the other end.
The Golden Rule? It's a good one. Paraphrased: "Treat others the way you want them to treat you." Would your comment make you feel horrible if it were directed at you? Is it more likely to turn people against your cause than bring people towards it? If you answer "yes" to either of those, you probably don't want to be hitting "send" on that nugget of hostility.

Or look at this tree.

#3 Stop. Breathe. Reflect before you type another word.
Is your heart beating faster as if you've just been physically threatened? This happens to me, too. Especially if someone has just attacked one of my core beliefs as in..."Women should not be in Congress," or "You are an over-privileged soccer mom." (I'm an over-previleged FINE ARTS mom, thanks) That accelerated pulse means you're entering an emotional area of the brain where your logic and long-term thinking are suppressed. You should measure your next words very, very carefully. Take a walk and look at a tree. Eat a piece of chocolate to release some serotonin brain chemicals to make you feel happier. Enforce a cooling down period on your comment. OR, just leave it alone. (see next paragraph)


#4 Don't make blanket insults.
Refrain from saying things like, "People who think that are..." or "You're all a bunch of..." As we'll see in an example below, it's hard to back up from that to say "Oh, well, I didn't mean YOU specifically." Yeah, you did. You said it and we can all read it right in front of us.

#5 Consider removing yourself from the equation if that's more beneficial.
Sean Astin, a celebrity activist who actually spends a lot of time online talking to his followers about controversial subjects, had this to say to a crowd at a RESULTS conference about getting involved in an unhealthy back and forth in a comments section. You know, those times when you want to say something positive someone and the internet trolls swoop in to attack? "Just drop your happy bomb and move on." Astin is always up for a thoughtful exchange of ideas, but I notice he's not above blocking people who just attack repeatedly with nothing constructive to say. Ending your engagement in the conversation is an option you have online that you don't have in real life and it's okay to exercise that choice. 

#6 Recognize the other person's feelings as valid
Are you still willing to be in the conversation and it seems the other person is really exchanging ideas instead of hurling insults? My favorite opening phrase when I'm trying to diffuse something online is, "I can tell that you are very passionate about this." It isn't mean. It doesn't give an inch of concession from my position. It states that I'm listening to them and I see what they are feeling without using the dangerous "I know how your feel" that leads to badness (What do you mean you know how I feel? You don't know how I feel! How dare you!!! etc, etc) A simple acknowledgement of emotion can be followed up with the next suggestion below...

#7 If possible, invite the other person to join you in making the world better!
This might be a radical thought, but if you can find any common ground at all, ask them to attend a meeting for a group you're involved in or to join an organization that supports your common ground. For instance, both Trump and Clinton supporters were interested in a fair election. Inviting the other person to be a legitimate election volunteer (not just a weird illegal lurker) might have been a place for common work. I often invite people to check out non-partisan groups I'm in that work on hunger or poverty. Even if someone doesn't believe in Food Stamp assistance, they might be willing to volunteer at a local food bank. Sometimes, I ask them to come to lobby with me or join RESULTS although no one online has ever taken me up on that yet. (Hope lives on!) It may not always be possible or appropriate due to geography or other circumstances, but I every time I do it, it diffuses the situation because the other person realizes one of three things:

1. I'm actually suggesting both an in person meeting and WORK, which is uncomfortable for habitual on-line ranters and they don't wish to engage anymore
2. I actually do respect their viewpoint enough to want to work with them on a deeper level
3. We're actually on the same side in the big picture

Want to see it in practice? Yesterday, on a friend's Facebook page, I saw her advocating for asking the electoral college to reject President-Elect Trump. A woman (who posed with my friend in an "I Voted! Vote like a girl!" selfie less than a week ago) was pressing her about this position. The debate got rough with this friend stating an opposite view about the electoral college saying, "shame on anyone who would think otherwise". I jumped in to commend my friend's bravery in defending a position when a friend was calling her lazy and shameful. Of course, that person engaged with me. 

Okay, if I had to do that again, I would have edited out the "Have a blessed, shame-free day" line because it doesn't read off the screen well. In my defense, I'd just come from church and I really wanted her to feel free of the shame she was casting on others in addition to just stopping the casting. But I could have stopped my comment one sentence earlier and it would have been better. Luckily, she kept talking and it could lead to the place where I could employ suggestions #6 and #7.

Her willingness to check out the weblink for RESULTS is about the best thing I could hope for, so I ended my involvement right there. If you can come to an understanding, everyone feels heard, and people walk away thinking there could be a possibility of working together...that is a best case scenario. It won't always work that way, so don't forget about option #5 about removing yourself from the troll equation, but why not hope for the best?

Remember, we have a wide array of emoticons these days. Let's try to use more than just the sad and angry ones!

How have you been dealing with 

social media dissent in your circles?