Friday, October 14, 2022

Stop Mommy-ing for Just a Second

I have a lot of work that I should do today before writing a blog, but I gotta stop.

I was just overcome with nostalgia when my photo storage service sent me one of those automated emails with a subject line of "Your memories from this day." A click greeted me with this picture.

Image: My pre-school children holding a picture of the Earth with the
misspelled words meaning "Bread for the World Help Poor."

It instantly transported me back to the circumstances leading up to the photo...

On October 14, 2008, I was a mom with a couple of precocious preschoolers aged 3 and almost 5. My husband travelled a lot for his job, so I spent many days alone without childcare trying to figure out how to enrich their little brains and hearts. Also, I was trying to figure out how to manage a household and find a purpose for myself while keeping them out of trouble!

Image: My kids standing at their craft table

I was a novice advocate for Bread for the World, learning new skills to fight global poverty. When I needed a few minutes to call or write handwritten letters to Congress, an old folding table held up with crates became a child-sized art surface to keep them quietly busy. It seemed like I was always trying to sneak in little actions to fight hunger in between my child care duties.

That evening, I’d made dinner and was calling the kids up to eat. Once, twice, three times. I felt like I’d been repeating myself all day long and my patience was running thin. I thumped downstairs yelling something like, “How many times do I like to repeat myself? None! Where are you?” They were so busy they didn’t even turn around until I used my angry Mommy Voice. And then, they turned together and showed me the project they’d been working on for me. Their confused and disappointed eyes told me they’d meant to make me happy, but didn’t know what to do now that I looked mad.

They were holding a sign with a blob that was clearly supposed to be the world. The charmingly misspelled words said "Bred fore the world help pore." (Later, I'd teach them to say "people struggling in poverty" instead of labelling "poor people" but we were a few years away from that nuance and spelling!)

Ah, mommies. Sometimes you gotta just stop. Stop and look at your children for who they are and not what you need them to do. I knew in my rush I was missing the key points of the day, which were:

  • They worked together
  • They used the crafts for creative expression
  • They'd been watching and understanding my activism work
  • They were showing me they loved me

So, I stopped. I hugged, asked questions, noticed details out loud, and took pictures. I restored their giggles and their confidence. The mischievous twinkle returned to their eyes. It was a teaching moment for all three of us…a moment I get to share with you today.

As an epilogue, I'll tell you they never stopped watching my activism. They are now both accomplished activists who teach me new things about new issues all the time.

As I stop my busy day once again and smile at that day 14 years ago, I hope all of you are finding moments today to stop and see what is in front of YOU.

Image: Book cover

Buy an autographed copy of "From Changing Diapers to Changing the World: Why Moms Make Great Advocates and How to Get Started" at my website www.changyit.com or order it from Amazon, Barnes and Noble, or any independent bookstore!