Moms Can Model Patience in 2020

Are you feeling as anxious as this leftover
Halloween pumpkin on my porch?

It’s the day after Election Day 2020 and you could say I’m a tad on edge. If you’re an American who follows news, I bet you are, too, as we wait for votes to be counted state by state. We knew we wouldn’t have a clear presidential winner. We KNEW a record number of mail-in votes would take days to count. 

And yet we still are experiencing a nationwide anxiety attack. We need to make sure that doesn’t devolve into a nationwide panic attack.

Let’s talk, moms, because our presidential election results might take days if we’re just waiting for counting or weeks if it goes into court battles.

Moms Can Model Patience

We’re gonna need some national patience and mothers can be an excellent source of it. Patience is a virtue mothers that mothers are supposed to teach to our children. Today, we should model that behavior for them, for those around us, and for ourselves. Uncertainty is scary, for sure. We are entitled to have worry and a host of negative feelings. Don’t bury your concern to hide it from your children, though. They should see genuine feelings from a parent. Instead, show them healthy ways to deal with uncertainty.

But how to we muster up the correct mindset to model patience if we’re not feeling it so much ourselves? It's difficult to be tell others to calmly wait for all the votes to be counted when you feel like burning all your relationships by yelling at people in all caps on social media all day! Well, I try to take the same advice I so freely give to my teens when they feel anxious about anything from exams to friendships.

Focus on the Positive

Focusing on positive outcomes from last night helps me keep an even keel. Look beyond the presidential headlines. See where you can find hope and inspiration in your local elections or other states. These are a few not-so-publicized items that lifted my spirits this morning:

Congressoman-elect Cori Bush

Cori Bush will represent Missouri’s 1st District 

Missouri will send its first Black female U.S. Representative to Washington D.C. She’s a mom, a nurse, a supporter of the Green New Deal, an activist for #BlackLivesMatter. She has also experienced homelessness with her husband and two young children. As an advocate on issues of poverty and health (and the mom of two climate activists), I look forward to working with a representative with these fresh perspectives for our state.

New Mexico Delegation of Color 

New Mexico will be the first state to elect all women of color to the U.S. House of Representatives. Congresswoman Deb Haaland, a Native American woman and a Democrat, kept her seat. Republican Yvette Herrell, a member of the Cherokee Nation, won the 2nd Congressional District. Democrat Teresa Leger Fernandez won the 3rd Congressional seat.

A nice flower now represents the
great state of Mississippi

Mississippi's State Flag

Mississippians adopted a new state flag after flying a Confederate emblem for 126 years. People might continue debating park statues and history, but a new era of voters decided that a symbol of oppression has no place flying outside a Capitol building representing all citizens. Symbols have power. I believe this is a step on the way to the laws INSIDE the Capitol representing citizens of color.

Senator-elect Mark Kelly

This one is getting a lot of coverage, but as a lifelong NASA fan and current Space Camp mom, I’m extremely excited about it. Astronauts have a unique global and pro-science perspective that few of us will ever know. I especially think this is true of Mark Kelly whose twin brother spent a whole year on the International Space Station. In addition, I’m relieved he’ll be a voice of reason in the Senate on gun policies since his wife, former Congresswoman Gabby Giffords is a gun violence survivor.

Hack into Your Hormones

Get yourself into healthy de-stressing actions. My high school friend (who is also a therapist) shared this useful chart. Careful with that suggestion of eating dark chocolate to release dopamine and endorphin. I think a lot of us ate our feelings last night, so maybe give some others a try for the sake of variety!